Piece of original illustration art by Amy Crehore (painted in oils on flat canvas, image is 7 3/4" x 5 3/4")
As you may know, I illustrated for many of America's top magazines starting in 1991 with Esquire and Playboy (my first big jobs). I'll never forget what a thrill it was to have my mug appear twice that year on the "Playbill" page. The magazines I have worked for over the years include: The Atlantic Monthly, Business Week, ESPN Magazine, Esquire, Forbes, GQ, Islands, The Los Angeles Times, MS., The New York Times, Outside, Playboy, Prevention, Redbook, Rolling Stone, Texas Monthly, Utne Reader and many more. I also did book covers for publishers such as Simon and Schuster and Houghton Mifflin. I even did a picture book once. I have drawers full of original illustration art. Most of my illustrations are oils on a piece of canvas taped to a board or on gessoed watercolor paper.
I plan to set up an online store soon to sell this illustration art (none of which appears on my website). Today, however, I am announcing a giveway contest for one of my originals. This one happens to be "Barbie as a Saint" (an illustration I did for Playboy).
CONTEST RULES:
Give this Barbie a saint's name and tell me what she did to deserve sainthood.
I will then pick the one I like the best and ship this painted little piece of "pop surrealism" to that person.
You have until Feb. 26th, noon PST to leave ONE comment on my blog. Anyone who leaves more than one comment and/or more than two sentences will be disqualified. I will decide who the winner is by Sunday night Feb. 27th, 2011, so watch my blog. I will ask that person to contact me via email.
Good luck and have fun! Love, Amy
30 comments:
I dreamt of Genie!
In my adolescence.
Her name is Santa Tacchi Alti. She is also known as "Milan's Pilgrim in Ferragamos"
Beulah May King, also known as St. Lulu of the Ozarks. Patron saint of wanderers and owners of vintage travel trailers.
Saint Belladonna, also called Notre Belle à Bête-Noire, patroness of spurned wives and jilted lovers, was hanged for poisoning her husband after he annulled their marriage, claiming a calling to join the priesthood, yet was discovered on the very night of his ordination in flagrant delicto with an acolyte of historically disputed gender yet undisputed adolescence.
'Santa Bella' was beatified after declaring in her dying words that she had erred mortally only to protect the sanctity of the institutions of the Mother Church 'into whose ample bosom she now entrusted her soul' -- a claim considered substantiated by the uncanny preservation of her unusually long golden hair -- and though obeisance to her was long suppressed as apocryphal, she was rehabilitated by Pope John XXIII under Vatican II and is once again celebrated annually (in many regions, through the tradition of anonymously-delivered slips of corrective criticism) on the feast day she shares with Saint Valentine.
St. Barbarella; she brought universal peace and good will to all planets in the galaxy through perseverance and sex appeal.
St Chastity.
For obvious anatomical reasons Barbie has been able to abstain from any and all lawful or unlawful sexual relations for the past 52 years.
Santa Barbara of El Segundo, patron saint of Little Girls. Santa Barbara achieved sainthood for her enormous contribution to the hope for each and every little girl, regardless of race and country of origin, to hold dozens of jobs from dog groomer to astronaut, teacher to president, and to own over 40 pets including a panda, a lion cub, and a zebra.
all islands lean heartward
Santa Plastica
Plastic Lady Of Our Toy Chest.
Saint Lola the Lovely, whose beauty curled the monkey's tails.
St. Barbra, Our Lady of Perpetual Tiptoe.
Who attained sainthood by walking barefoot (on her toes, obviously) across the United States to raise little girls' awareness of how she and Ken don't always have to wind up in compromising positions, both within and outside of the Barbie Dream House.
St. Supercelia
Patron saint of superficiality and arrogant self-deception.
Saint Dorisdia: She supported her secretly gay boyfriend for 50 years.
The Virgin Barbie: keeping her box closed since 1959.
St. Patience Divine...the baker of "pie squared"
Saint Barbie of the Mattel Fields who saved white after Labor Day ascended to Heaven after she lost her head in a hot tub for the 9th time. There she preceded to teach all the other saints the appropriate way to wear leopard print.
Saint Barbie of Kitsch, Our Lady of Plastic Curves
Achieved sainthood after transcending from her born position as the beloved slave/servant of impossible glamour and conscripted consumption to which young hearts and minds were to be warped and molded for the greater corporate benefit to her current status as an icon of impossible glamour, conscripted consumption, transient job security, sexless love, and plastic surgery for an ever widening variety of worshipers who pray to the saint of crushed childhood dreams and plastic curves.
St. Nopoka. First to adopt the sealed plastic vagina as a lifestyle choice.
Saint Joli Jouet; she of the playful little ones. She gave her life that Skipper might live.
Santa Barbarella del Pueblo de Nuestra Senora de los Angeles de Porciuncula. Beatified for standing by her monosyllabic life partner for nigh 50 years in the face of many temptations* despite his lack of a fully deployable male anatomy. True believers ascribe to this steadfastness the "Miracle of the Immaculate Complexion" which has spared the virgin saint from the tribulations of ageing or the humiliations of an empty checking account.
______
*Many of which were brought on by precocious pre-teens who in their passion for discovery used the likeness of Santa Barbarella to make her "boldly go where no doll has gone before"...
The Virgin of Santa Barbara
Our Lady of the Perpetual Stiletto
Patron Saint of Podiatrists
Santa Barbara achieved sainthood by standing on tiptoe for years in an effort to see into heaven so she could speak to God personally about getting Ken and herself some functioning equipment. She never did succeed, but her unerring faithfulness to both God and her plastic paramour nonetheless (despite unfounded rumors regarding GI Joe) has earned her a place in the rolls of the sanctified. Unfortunately, as her mother had predicted early on, her continuous stance caused her feet to freeze that way - necessitating an endless supply of imminently losable plastic heels while guaranteeing job security for countless future generations of podiatrists.
Saint Babette. The Patron Saint of everything that is sexy, christian, and wholesome.
whats Kens role in all this?
Dear RL: Ken's role is mysterious.
St. Agistina of Morano
Patron Saint of Melons and the Island of Borano
- Kozmicdogz
Saint Rubia. With divine patience, she suffered agony in innumerable hours of "play" in little girl's rooms and served as anatomical model for little boys - without loosing her joyful smile.
Saint Barbunny of the Holy Mansion. Achieved sainthood by gaining admittance to the mighty Playboy shrine without having to display - or indeed, having - nipples or genitals.
This is simply, "Barbie, Patron Saint of Wonderful Surprises", because of all the wonderful surprises she herself has provided to the imagination of smiling, happy girls on special occasions. Barbie as "Saint of Wonderful Surprises", provides wonderful surprises to everyone, filling one with a sense of wonder, not miraculous of nature, but common day juxtapositions of events providing experiences that mean the world to that someone, as for instance, a long lost friend finding you on Facebook, the arrival of a new pet, a baby's first laugh, lying in the sun and seeing someone's face you know in the clouds, the first 'snow day', discovering that Santa finished off the cookies and milk and left everyone pretty presents, sharing a smile with a stranger, the first kiss, an end to the war, unwrapping a treasured piece of art that just arrived, and so many other daily occurrences that sustain happiness through memory for many years to come, and upon reflecting on them, make one smile.
The contest has now ended and I will try to get results by Sunday nite.
However, I forgot about the Oscars, so it will probably be more like Monday.
Watch my blog.
Thank you all so much for your creative answers. Deciding who wins will be very hard.
xxx
Amy
OMG!!! i totally love this painting! I teach Amy Crehore, the younger. Barbie helped prevent me from imagining for v long when i was little that i was going to become a nun!!! so she's a saint to me!! i know the contest is over, but she will always be St. Woo-Woo to me, which is what she showed to Ken when he walked by [there was only one nonCatholic girl in the neighborhood who had a Ken] and she pulled her strapless bathing suit down a bit--woo-woo!!!
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